The Funniest Thing in the World

The funniest thing in the world, I know,

Is watchin' the monkeys 'at's in the show!

Jumpin' an' runnin' an' racin' roun',

'Way up the top o' the pole; nen down!

First they're here, an' nen they're there,

An' ist a'most any an' ever'where!

Screechin' an' scratchin' wherever they go,

They're the funniest thing in the world, I know!

They're the funniest thing in the world, I think:—

Funny to watch'em eat an' drink;

Funny to watch'em a-watchin' us,

An' actin' 'most like grown folks does!

Funny to watch'em p'tend to be

Skeerd at their tail 'at they happen to see;

But the funniest thing in the world they do

Is never to laugh, like me an' you!